Ode to toad
Honestly, I expect to wake one morning and find him gone. It's how most people wind up in my life literally and figuratively. How I remember 14 years of marriage. toad told me, “If we don't get married I can move out.”
I went for abuse we married. Honestly, I didn't make enough money to support My daughter and I. I couldn't risk moving back with my mother. My mother a safety hazard. Together our incomes did alright I made 1200.00 monthly.
Day we married depressed, forgot rings, rained, Titanic sunk, date of pedophile's birthday. We needed to marry that day bc license expired next day. The ceremony a joke, we get home, he tells me we are not legally married bc license expired.
No, dummy miscounted days, seriously Judge would not sign certificate if invalid. Where my problems began: computer, sex, and drug addictions.
Genuinely Assured me, he couldn't help me with anything, bc he didn't understand my abused existence like story goes he's a guy or she's a girl applies to cheaters thank you Bill engvall for such an insightful piece. Toad attended certain appointments he had a fuck able date later that day.
toad never shared finances he brought home first bonus, screaming he dropped bonus check in a puddle, and how I caused him stress? My logical question, “Why wasn't your check tucked safely in your wallet?”, oh my gawd he lost his shit. I asked, “Can't u have check re issued? I am not humiliating myself asking for another check. How we spoke of money resulted in arguments.
We had bills out the ass! 800.00 rent, credit card 328.00, Comcast 99.00, insurance 400.00, car payment 428.00, cellphone 75.00. Those bills above our means. Toad didn't pay bills, our bills overdue. Toad left household finances to me. From 2005-2008 our credit card 0 balance, car paid 4 months in advance, cellphone, utilities, and comcast advanced 3 months. 6,000 in savings.
my accomplishments in war of finances. I am a ocd crack head, fear of being without shelter. My fear of being without shelter drove me to obsessively have things paid. I stopped my business in 2008, toad said I didn't have authorization to work on a military base overseas states my work is soliciting. I stopped my income, Like a dummy I believed him.
toad likes jobs entailing travels gives him time to find hot hookup meet for a quick drink. toad calls me when he can't find a date on the fly.
money planned for vegasbaby and romantic escapes. toad took whatever he could for vegasbaby. Stole, lied, cheated, and devestated My Daughter and I. Now he has a lil shit spike, toad passed his momma's U.G.L.Y Gene, that computer generated photo 1000x better than reality it's how mommy wished hadly looked. We live in vehicle toad will kill car battery to talk to lil spikey shit.
Didn't give birth to gremlin, hadly's the spore that flew off of Gizmo's back. Damn she's gotta crater on chin surgery can't correct. Fast forward 2013 he contacted a lawyer, had divorce papers ready in 2015 California. Mommie in law sent emi on her first cruise a gift to new bride in 2014, banking on a mother inlaw suite of her dreams. wart's mother invested in a lie.
My in-laws hang head in shame knowing wart didn't pull trigger. Makes me wonder what promises were lost is like money. Looks like everyone is playing a bit part. Instead of divorcing, toad wanted to kill me, agenda hasn't changed. He lawyered up without telling me it's against the law. Meaning he's moved finances, and is willing to break any law to save his hide. Today he has a fake family through him birthday party. Poor baby never celebrates his birthday.
What a fucking liar he'd visit actual family frequently a hop, skip, and jump who is ready to support toad. They think I am crazy, but actors playing bit part. Fake family ready to kill ensure family secrets. girl tried running us off the road by keeping fender an inch off our bumper. Explains my level of vehicular harassment. Girl's engaged to some prick, and chasing a married couple.
What a psycho contradictive fucking bitch. Cuz lil girl has control issue just the way toad likes'em insecure. A month ago I asked my husband to call me from his phone line not work number. The dumbass doesn't respect my wishes, cuz if he can get away with it once, he'll make a habit to forget. toad will stand in a creek to say that he's working the water lines were way to defined in Jean, feet clean tossed mud neck to seem like he's working.
My husband has a morbid desire to fuck me before I die what a strange perversion. toad asks, “Why am I trying to harm him?” No, I'm trying to save you, if anyone wants to fuck around let dog and pony show begin. When people say,”What you think ur better than everyone else.“
No, I know what I wouldn't want done to Me, and I have a lifetime of experience. Domination isn't power, control, isolation, authority, those are tools used by weak individuals who muscle fear and intimation. Tells me alot about them. Cowards send armies, before they ever stand on front lines of battle.